“...if friendship is such a gift, why do so many pastors struggle to cultivate deep, lasting relationships?”

The problem that this article misses is that a majority of men struggle to cultivate deep, last relationships. This is shown up in so many statistics including suicide. This is pervasive of men. Since pastors are almost exclusively men, it is pervasive among them.

Dave Sweda has a good point that too many men in general don't have friends--maybe the article could be rewritten for all men without too much harm. But that noted, I think there's a case to be made that overwork plagues a huge portion of pastors, and I've seen a subset of pastors whose insecurity is such that they cannot have others working on a relatively even plane with them-- "this here church isn't big enough for the two of us", that sort of thing.

I am scared, though, to make the accusation broadly. I guess I've been blessed to have had a number of good pastors who could be friends with people, and who could share the sandbox well with others--along with a couple who could not.