The Proper Care and Feeding of Pastors

by Dan Burrell

1 Timothy 5:17—”Let the elders who rule well be considered worthy of double honor, especially those who labor in preaching and teaching.”
This article is not intended to be one filled with whining about the stress of being a pastor. Some may assume that this article is a sort of personal axe-grinding due to the fact that this author has recently resigned his latest pastorate of seven and a half years and will be taking a hiatus of pastoral leadership after more than 17 years as a senior pastor. But they would be mistaken.

For the record, I began this article prior to reaching the decision of changing the focus of my personal ministry. But I believe all pastors—current and former—would agree that those who have been in pastoral ministry can say “amen” to much in this article. Because I have nothing to gain, I do feel freer to address this topic today than I have in the past. Regardless, the proper care of our pastors is a topic that is too often neglected in our churches.

Take a look at the following statistics from the Maranatha Life website:

• 1,500 pastors leave the ministry each month due to moral failure, spiritual burnout, or contention in their churches.
• 80% of pastors and 84% percent of their spouses feel unqualified and discouraged in their role as pastors.
• 50% percent of pastors are so discouraged that they would leave the ministry if they could but have no other way of making a living.
• 80% percent of seminary and Bible school graduates who enter the ministry will leave the ministry within the first five years.
• 85% percent of pastors said their greatest problem is that they are sick and tired of dealing with problem people such as disgruntled elders, deacons, worship leaders, worship teams, board members, and associate pastors. 90% percent said the hardest thing about ministry is dealing with uncooperative people.
• 70% of pastors feel grossly underpaid.
• 70% felt God called them to pastoral ministry before their ministry began, but after three years of ministry, only 50% percent still felt called.

Few pastors will admit to being anything less than a “ministry superman.” Seventy-hour work weeks, interrupted meals and vacations, multiple sermon and lesson preparations per week, a myriad of meetings, and a plethora of other responsibilities ranging from the mundane (proofing the bulletin, making sure the choir music is ready, checking the temperature of the baptismal water on Saturday night) to the divine (sitting next to a dear saint as he enters life everlasting, discipling a new believer on the fundamentals of the faith, being part of the salvaging of a marriage) are just par for the pastoral course. Sadly, what too often occurs is that ministry “supermen” eventually hit the wall of exhaustion, discouragement, depression, or simply emptiness. They crash and burn, becoming casualties of their own egos, ambitions, or simply earnestness.

Besides, complaining is decidedly unspiritual and won’t change a thing. Let’s face it, even the well-meaning person who periodically asks the pastor if he’s taking enough time for his family will expect him to leave his 10-year-old’s birthday party if he has a personal emergency.

Pastoral burnout and discouragement are a reality. For those who would dismiss this reality by noting that other careers are also high stress (surgeons, defense attorneys, whatever it is that Jack Bauer does), they would be wise to note that pastors deal with spiritual warfare that carries with it a dynamic that is unique among secular professions.

Large-church pastors may envy small-church pastors due to smaller crowds and less administrative responsibility but forget that small-church pastors often have few or no support staffers to help carry the load. Small-church pastors may envy large-church pastors due to multiple staff pastors and support personnel but fail to consider that those same pastors are expected to be CEO’s, master fund-raisers, and amazing speakers. They are also expected to be exceptionally connected in their community.

If we can be perfectly honest, many pastors are in need of some spiritual, emotional, and physical care. Too many are running, running only to collapse, fearing the distinct possibility that their board will escort them to the curb. Then the board will begin searching for another leader who will spend the next three to seven years giving his all until he also collapses.

Beyond the spiritual implications of that kind of mentality, congregations and lay leadership should remember that statistics show that generally the longer the tenure of the pastor, the larger the church; and that most pastors report that their most blessed years were sometime after their first decade in leadership at that church.

So this article is a challenge to those who sit in the pews and on the committees and boards of the church. Take care of your pastors! It is part of the congregation’s responsibility to ensure that the pastor is able to take care of himself and his family so he can serve the Lord and the flock effectively. Sure, you can take a work horse and feed him mealy grain, musty hay, and dirty water. He’ll survive and even work. But he won’t be as healthy, productive, and effective as the work horse who eats fresh oats, rich alfalfa, and clean water. The same is true of pastors.

As a pastor of 17 years who no longer has anything to gain by writing on this topic, let me offer 10 practical tips for the proper care and feeding of your pastor.

1. Insist that your pastor practices the biblical principle of “sabbath.” If you discovered that your pastor was violating one of the Ten Commandments—say by committing adultery, by using the Lord’s name in vain, or by coveting his neighbor’s wife—you would be outraged and take action. So why is it considered spiritual to make a pastor work seven days a week? Make sure your pastor is taking one 24-hour day off each week for physical, emotional, and spiritual rejuvenation.
2. Remember, the absence of active resistance is not the same as active support. Some deacons, elders, and church members think they are being “supportive” of their pastor by simply not opposing him (though opposition is a viable option in their minds if there’s something going on that bothers them personally). But consider this: the soldier who must carry the dead weight of a wounded, unconscious, or sleeping soldier during battle may not be as bad off as the person who is fighting hand-to-hand with the enemy. But at the end of the day, he is still going to be exhausted and will have been ineffective.Make sure to show your pastor active support by attending, giving, participating, encouraging and assisting. Be loyal, defend your pastor to critics, “amen” his efforts, and be enthusiastic about his vision. By being an active supporter, you will be a regular blessing to your pastor.
3. Send your pastor to the mission field at least once each year. Sometimes a change of ministry scenery can give your pastor a fresh vision for ministry at home. Paul records many examples of how blessed he was by the friends and churches he met on his missionary journeys. They encouraged him, and he recalled their gifts with fondness. He anticipated his return. Each church should set aside $200 to $300 a month from their missions budget specifically for sending the pastor to a foreign field to minister for a week or two each year. (Note: This trip should be part of his ministry and not in lieu of vacation.) Those who do so will notice that his spirit will be revived, his illustrations will be more personal, his vision will be broadened, and you will be blessed.
4. Fund his library. Leaders are readers. If your pastor isn’t reading, he’ll soon fall behind in leading. As you set up your budget, put aside $50 to $100 per month so he can buy books. Or encourage your church members to give him gift cards to Amazon or Books-A-Million for his birthday or anniversary. Don’t pick the books for him. Let him choose what interests him or topics where he needs to be learning or growing. And don’t forget, if he has books to read, he’s going to need time to read them!
5. Consider periodic sabbaticals. If your pastor preaches 45 weeks a year at least twice a week (some preach three to four messages a week) and then add special services, weddings, funerals, and Sunday school lessons, it’s easy for your pastor to have 150 preparations per year. If he is an earnest student, it may take him eight hours to adequately prepare a meaty sermon. That could be as many as 24 hours per week—just in study!Consider giving him one to three months off per summer to study, to take some seminary classes, and to plan his sermons for the rest of the year. Some large churches give the entire summer to the pastor for study and preparation. A few churches even arrange a year-long sabbatical every seven years so the pastor can work on a graduate degree or study abroad. Use his absences from the pulpit to develop the pulpit teaching of others in the congregation such as assistant pastors or the elders (who should be proficient at teaching the Scripture by definition of their role).
6. Require him to take vacations at least two weeks at a time. Early in one of my pastorates, I received a letter from a deacon who suggested that I arrange my vacations so I would leave on Sunday afternoon and return on Saturday night. That way, I’d never leave the pulpit open for a guest speaker on a Sunday morning. He also tried to use flattery to convince me that my absence led to a deterioration of the service, so I just had to be there. What the deacon didn’t realize is that most pastors work on their sermons throughout the week and spend Saturdays tinkering and adding last-minute final touches. Sunday afternoons and Mondays are often times of exhaustion as the pastor recuperates from a strenuous day of preaching, teaching, discipling, and counseling. I often joke that, while on vacation, it takes me three days just to unwind from the stress of ministry (though I stupidly check my e-mail and voice mail several times a day). Then three days before I return to work, I start keying back up and putting my head back in the pastoral game—which leaves me only one real vacation day from a one-week vacation. Now not everyone is as neurotic as I am, but in a moment of honesty many pastors may share with you that they need several days before “vacation mode” kicks in and that “back-to-work mode” kicks in well before they return home.
7. Send him and his wife somewhere for spiritual recharging. I’ve never known a marriage that couldn’t use a little recharging from time to time. Your pastor’s marriage is no exception. As a gift to your pastor and his wife, occasionally send them to a marriage retreat or simply give them a couple of days at a bed and breakfast, at a church member’s vacation home, or at an area resort. A rested pastor who has a sweet relationship with his wife will be an inspiration to your entire church family.
8. Respect his study and private time. Once a church member told me that he was leaving our church because he needed a pastor who would let him drop by at any time at his office or at his home and enjoy some fellowship and a cup of coffee. I enjoy a few minutes of fellowship and a tall glass of sweet tea as much as the next guy, but most pastors need some sort of schedule for study, prayer, and even family time—which is sacred for them. Pastors understand drop-in meetings due to emergencies, but remember—his first calling is to prayer, to Bible study, and to the equipping of the saints. Just be courteous and call ahead. If he doesn’t want to be interrupted, don’t get upset. Be grateful that he’s busy in the work of the ministry.
9. Come together as a church for an annual expression of appreciation. One pastor confided to me that he absolutely hated October. I asked him why, and he told me it was because Focus on the Family had set aside October several years ago as “Pastor’s Appreciation Month.” All month long, this pastor heard the reminders on the Christian radio station, saw the ads at the Christian bookstore, and heard stories from other pastors of how they had been blessed by members of their congregation. He, however, received no acknowledgment at all. He wasn’t bitter—he really loved his church. But he was still hurt, and I could see the disappointment on his face. You don’t have to throw a party each time your pastor finishes a sermon. But remember, pastoral ministry is physically, spiritually, and emotionally draining. Designate a time once or twice a year when you tell your pastor, “We love you and appreciate you.” There are several opportunities—Pastor’s Appreciation Month is an obvious one. But there’s also Christmas, his birthday, the anniversary of his call to be your pastor, his wedding anniversary, or just a surprise day. Choose one or two events each year and say, “Thank you for loving us!” Watch him blossom and give you back even more. Here are a few more thoughts: Don’t wait for someone else to plan the event; someone has to take the lead. Also, don’t just simply put the recognition in the budget and hand him a check. Be thoughtful, personal, and creative! (And the gesture doesn’t have to be expensive.) Here’s an example: For Pastor’s Appreciation Month, ask 31 people to sign up to do something simple and thoughtful for your pastor each day of the month. Let them be creative. One day he may get a six-pack of his favorite soda. Another day he might get a gift card to his favorite restaurant. Later, he might get a freshly baked pie. He doesn’t need to get a new car! Just a thoughtful gesture will go a long way in encouraging his soul.
10. Equip him for efficiency. Have your church provide your pastor with the tools that will make him effective and efficient. Make sure he has a cell phone. Get him a laptop computer. Consider a Blackberry. Give him a stipend to take graduate-school classes. Make sure his office is professionally equipped. By freeing up some of his time with efficiency instruments, he’ll have more time left over to serve the Lord.

In closing, consider this. The more you invest in your pastor, the healthier and happier he will be in his role; and you, in turn, will be blessed. Would you go to a doctor who is exhausted, who uses outdated instruments, who possesses a trouble marriage, who has years-old journals on his shelves, and who hasn’t taken any refresher classes in years? Would you want a doctor like that attending to your physical needs? If you wouldn’t go to a doctor like that, why would you put your pastor in the same situation?

Double honor. Simple appreciation. Consideration. Thoughtfulness. Investment. These are the ingredients for a healthy and growing relationship with your pastor. Feed him well and care for him faithfully, and he’ll do the same for you!

(Note: If you or your pastor is in crisis or is experiencing burnout and could use a sound, biblical perspective, consider contacting the Institute for Biblical Leadership (Lake Lure, NC). These sound, biblical trainers and counselors will help your pastor and church develop healthy leadership.)

Dan Burrell is senior pastor at Northside Baptist Church (Charlotte, NC). He’s also a commentator for the Evangelical Press News and blogs at Whirled Views with Dan Burrell.