Based on your perception, do newcomers to your church typically find it friendly or no? (the norm). Comments appreciated.

Please do not say the forbidden statement, “It depends on the people.” Of course it does — give us credit, please! We are talking about the norm that comes up through the grape vine.

Many churches are friendly to people who are part of the church family, but it is tough to “break in” and make friends. Some people want just one friend and then their group is closed. Others do not consider what it is like to be the new kid on the block.

IMO, churches made up of out-of-towners (military personnel, folks who moved in for jobs, etc.) are friendlier to newcomers than churches whose extended families live in the area (many of their relational needs and social activities involve their families).

Then there is the introvert/extrovert thing. Add to that the difference between depth of relationship (some people are friendly but you never really get deep with them), and the friendliness quotient getes complex.

We have heard, over the years, that we are too friendly and very friendly, but we have often heard just the opposite.

Here are a few questions; please choose one or two to address, if you have something helpful to say.

What makes for a friendly church? Do a few extroverts on the look out for newcomers make such a difference that their presence or absence determines how people perceive the friendliness quotient? What influences the perception of a friendly church? What has your church done (successfully) to improve friendliness?