Five Christmas Songs No One Should Ever Sing Again

The “Did you know?” question is in reference to quite a few things she certianly did not know…. starting with the very first line: “would someday walk on water.” Somebody is trying way too hard to find fault.

(Not that it’s a great song or that I would miss it much!)

A much better “Mary song” if you’re looking for one, is For Ages Women Hoped and Prayed

There are a tremendous number of fun songs at Christmas that have nothing to do with the Savior, and I don’t fault people for desiring to hold to good hymns that do. And that noted, there are also a tremendous number of flat out stupid Christmas songs that should be put in a stainless steel drum and buried about five miles deep.

I’ve sang “Mary Did You Know,” and I always preface it with a reference that there was much she did know about the coming Messiah (primarily from Isaiah). But as Aaron already pointed out, there was much she did not. And after all, theologians (much less common Christians) are still trying to fathom the incarnation and its implications today; so give the young, virgin Jewish girl a break for not knowing everything, for she still had faith in God’s word about it all, even though not fully knowing (but pondering those things in her heart, Luke 2:19).

And even now, mediating on this point from the song fills me with wonder:

When you kiss your Little Baby,
You kiss the Face of God!

In short, that song did not deserve to make even a top 100 list of “Christmas Songs No One Should Ever Sing Again.”

As a musician, I did find the read pretty funny. It hit the point on the “secular” songs and does not mock traditional songs that can appear annoying on the surface and do have a deeper meaning such as “The 12 days of Christmas” and “God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen.” After a week of elementary concerts I don’t care if I never hear “Jingle Bells” again. Every beginning band and orchestra method book have that and “Good King Wenceslaus” cleverly laid out to land just about … now.

Even if not exactly theologically inaccurate, “Mary, Did you Know?” definitely suffers from overuse and lackluster performance.

I think of the song “Mary, Did You Know” as more of a rhetorical question.

Anyway, I thought the article was a funny poke at popular Christmas songs. Especially the critique of Rudolph. As long as they don’t fuss at classics like “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer”. ;)

I was in a couple of stores yesterday, and my ears were assaulted by some truly horrific covers of Christmas songs. I’ll be glad when breathy, raspy, nasally vocals go out of style.

to Susan about the rhetorical thinking.

[Susan R]

I think of the song “Mary, Did You Know” as more of a rhetorical question.

Anyway, I thought the article was a funny poke at popular Christmas songs. Especially the critique of Rudolph. As long as they don’t fuss at classics like “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer”.

I was in a couple of stores yesterday, and my ears were assaulted by some truly horrific covers of Christmas songs. I’ll be glad when breathy, raspy, nasally vocals go out of style.

Amen. I’ve got to confess that I get a kick out of things that Dr. Demento put on his show and Christmas album….except for the one he did about “I’m a Christmas Tree”, gack. Oh for the days when people knew how to sing properly and had a real sense of humor.

Also, don’t forget “Rusty Chevrolet” by Da Yoopers.

There are a number of Christmas song genres:

Biblical: Songs that recount aspects of the Biblical account, or provide theological reflection or worship.
Biblical fiction: Songs like ‘I Saw Three Ships’ that create fictional situations around the Biblical story.
Celebratory: Songs like ‘Deck the Halls.’
Traditions: Songs expressing nostalgic reflections and memories like ‘White Christmas’ and ‘I’ll Be Home for Christmas.’
Seasonal: Songs focusing on winter as much as Christmas like ‘Jingle Bells.’
Mythology: Yes, the Santa songs go in this category.
Classical: Music like Tchaikovsky’s ‘Nutcracker.’

Some of my favorites in no particular order:

Bring a Torch, Jeanette, Isabella
Carol of the Bells
Come, Thou Long Expected Jesus
Coventry Carol (a sad lullaby to one of the babies killed by Herod)
Ding Dong! Merrily on High
Do You Hear What I Hear?
Good Christian Men Rejoice
I Saw Three Ships
In the Bleak Midwinter
Jesus, Jesus, Rest Your Head
Lo, How a Rose E’er Blooming
Masters in This Hall
O Come, O Come, Emmanuel
O Holy Night
Pat-a-Pan
Rise up, Shepherd, and Follow
Still, Still, Still
The Holly and the Ivy
The Sussex Carol
Wexford Carol
What Child is This?

All Christmas music—good, bad, and indifferent—should be relegated to Christmas Eve Day, starting around breakfast, and concluded by noon Christmas Day. Penalties should be harsh should it be played at other times. I’m thinking of lobbying my congressman for a law.

[Lee]

All Christmas music—good, bad, and indifferent—should be relegated to Christmas Eve Day, starting around breakfast, and concluded by noon Christmas Day. Penalties should be harsh should it be played at other times. I’m thinking of lobbying my congressman for a law.

Glad I don’t know many grinches like you, though I’m also grinchy if it starts before Thanksgiving or more than a week past New Year’s Day. ! I like Christmas music, including material from the medieval times up through modern. However, I don’t want to hear the same exact music too many times either, which is one of the things that drives people crazy. Suffice it to say I have enough different Christmas albums I’ve collected for more than 30 years that iTunes tells me it would take over 12 days played continuously 24/7 to play all of it. In fact, I never get around to all of it in any one year, and there are probably songs I haven’t listened to in years, since I listen to it randomly. I have two playlists that play random songs, one that doesn’t repeat anything played in the last 15 days, and one that doesn’t repeat anything I’ve listened to the current year or last Christmas either. That way, I don’t get tired of it.

That doesn’t prevent my hearing the same songs when I’m out, at restaurants, etc., but it mostly mitigates that effect. Works well for me, and easier than a law! :)

Worst Christmas album ever:
https://www.amazon.com/Christmas-Stars-Star-Wars-Album/dp/B0000033VG

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[CAWatson]

Worst Christmas album ever:

https://www.amazon.com/Christmas-Stars-Star-Wars-Album/dp/B0000033VG

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That definitely has to be higher up the “bad Christmas songs” list than “Mary did you know?”

Apparently there was a Star Wars “Holiday” Special, too. It’s referenced in Weird Al’s White & Nerdy at about 2:30 into the video.

I think Christmas music started getting annoying about the time radio stations started playing Christmas music 24/7 a month or more ahead of Christmas. I first noticed this trend in the very late 90s. It was fine to hear a song like “Jingle Bell Rock” maybe once a week or less mixed in with a station’s usual playlist. But when you hear two and even three covers of “Winter Wonderland” in a single hour of listening, that gets old.