Should We Dress For Church Like We’re Meeting With the President?

Here’s the solution … anytime you look across the aisle and think - “that guy is not dressed appropriately for church”. Do this:

After church, walk over to him and say … “Come with me on Saturday … I’m going to buy you a suit at Men’s Warehouse”

For me, the command to come comes first—rich and poor, Israel was commanded to come to Jerusalem three times a year, no?—and then the James passage about “vile raiment” comes to mind. Come, do your best to be decent and clean, but …..COME.

That said, Jim’s suggestion appeals to me in terms simply of how we ought to minister. Now few of us are going to drop half a grand on a whim like that, but what about getting to know the guy in the next pew, and if it turns out that he seems to be a guy whose prior poverty is holding him to garments that are going to prevent him from getting decent work, by all means help him out to get an outfit or two that might help him get to the next level—and when he asks (as he probably will) what he can do to “pay you back”, just tell him that the biggest thing you want is for him to use the opportunity well, and if he’s really blessed, do the same thing for another guy.

This was a good article to debunk the idea that I grew up hearing as well. The church is not a place, it is a people, it is not an event (although it involves weekly events), it is a congregation of people. The idea of “Sunday Best” is meant to honor God and I appreciate its sentiments, but it really is about making us feel as if we have honored God because in reality God never requires this kind of thing and has never hinted that dressing nicely honors Him. The intangibles of mercy, love, forgiveness, humility are what really honor God.

Besides, the whole culture of dressing in a suit for church is a throwback western cultural cue that for the most part has been left behind. It used to be understood that was what you do, but today as the “Christendom” dynamic is shifting, the once understood cultural elements of a Christianized populace are quickly diminishing. The kind of fundamentalism that insists on preserving these cultural expressions only reveal how irrelevant they are because they’ve missed the point of the church’s place in society.

On a side note, the picture of Obama with Zuckerberg above is more of an accommodation on the President’s part than an accommodation Zuckerberg’s part. The President is not wearing his coat and Zuckerberg met him half way by wearing a tie with his jeans. Even Presidential statesmanship is becoming more casual.

Isn’t there a rule that says you aren’t allowed to gripe about the music if you aren’t wearing a suit and tie (preferably 3-piece or double-breasted) in a traditional church or torn jeans and a graphic t-shirt in a contemporary church?

It’s worth noting that the traditional meaning of wearing a coat and tie, at least since the Industrial Revolution started, was that you could wrap a piece of silk around your neck without fearing it would get pulled into a pulley at the factory or the farm, and that your nice wool coat and silk tie were not likely to be ruined by grease and other substances.

In other words, apart from special occasions, it’s always been a sign that you had attained an office job, that you were in the upper middle class or above. Now I don’t know whether people generally know this today, but we might consider what message the suit & tie actually sends these days. It could be very benign, or it could really put off those who are blue collar and self-conscious about it.

a traditional church? [It is a real question.]

“The kind of fundamentalism that insists on preserving these cultural expressions only reveal how irrelevant they are because they’ve missed the point of the church’s place in society.”

Does this translate down to the individual who is preserving these “cultural expressions?”

Obnoxious: Gum chewing & smelly people!

My solution to them: gum chewing. Ignore. Smelly people. Don’t sit close

“So often it seems we want a fortress where the overlooked and underprivileged aren’t allowed through the front gate, and where outcasts are denied membership and are silently pushed out of our designer label kingdom.”

After 50 years of attending conservative churches, I have never seen that statement to be true. However, I have seen it turned on it’s head and witnessed those who would wear jeans that they had taken the time to rip up and scribble all over in order to make some kind of point. They are the only ones that I have ever seen separate themselves and promote a certain dress code. (http://www.churchinroanoke.com/)

Here’s an experience I had with conservative church dress codes:

A few years ago, I visited a local church attended by some friends of mine. They had invited me to a special service, and I was happy to oblige. After taking a seat, an usher (he wore an “Usher” nametag) came over to me. I assumed he was coming to greet a visitor—someone he’d never seen before. Nope. He had come over to scold me for being inappropriately dressed for church! (I was wearing tailored dress slacks, a long-sleeved shirt with a button-down collar, and a pull-over sweater.) No jacket & tie though, which was the offense for which he scolded me…

[Larry Nelson]

Here’s an experience I had with conservative church dress codes:

A few years ago, I visited a local church attended by some friends of mine. They had invited me to a special service, and I was happy to oblige. After taking a seat, an usher (he wore an “Usher” nametag) came over to me. I assumed he was coming to greet a visitor—someone he’d never seen before. Nope. He had come over to scold me for being inappropriately dressed for church! (I was wearing tailored dress slacks, a long-sleeved shirt with a button-down collar, and a pull-over sweater.) No jacket & tie though, which was the offense for which he scolded me…

Sounds like classic IFB-3 procedure. :-)

Oh, really. come to Hamilton Square Baptist Church in San Francisco and find out.

[M Leslie] SNIP

Sounds like classic IFB-3 procedure.

[Doug Flynn]

“So often it seems we want a fortress where the overlooked and underprivileged aren’t allowed through the front gate, and where outcasts are denied membership and are silently pushed out of our designer label kingdom.”

After 50 years of attending conservative churches, I have never seen that statement to be true. However, I have seen it turned on it’s head and witnessed those who would wear jeans that they had taken the time to rip up and scribble all over in order to make some kind of point. They are the only ones that I have ever seen separate themselves and promote a certain dress code. (http://www.churchinroanoke.com/)

Two horrible instances - first, as a young youth pastor, I was told by a deacon’s wife to take a young girl home because her odor was bothering people. This was a girl who we were really ministering to and really trying to help because of a bad home situation. My wife and I took her home with tears - and soon found another place to minister. Second, I was making calls to a girl’s home who I was told was not allowed to come to our youth group activities. I wondered why, so I called her. She had been met at the door of our church in the early 70’s by a couple of leaders in the church and told that the young men she had with her needed to go away because they were dressed liked hippies. This was a young lady who had recently come to Christ who wanted her friends to come hear about Jesus. She never came back, and 30 years later did not want her child to come to a church like that. Our “snobbiness” has an effect on people.

Really appreciate Bob’s point; I’ve done a touch of youth ministry as well, and it was always tough to figure out where to “let things slide” in terms of dress, and where to approach someone. I came to the conclusion that I did best to “let things slide”, present basics of modesty, and only confront when the offender was (a) long time attender and (b) behavior fairly egregious. Even then it wasn’t fun, and I’d appreciate hearing from others on this.