Should we celebrate Mother's Day in church?

My first thought was along the lines of this quote:

“Focusing an entire service on Mother’s Day on mothers becomes problematic, because you are taking the focus away from God and could be doing pastoral damage—to those who don’t have good relationships with their mothers; those whose mothers have passed away; those who want to be moms but can’t be moms. When we do mention it, we need to be very careful. Comments and pastoral prayers can recognize mothers and at the same time recognize those who live with hurt related to their own mothers or motherhood.”

I would also add that there are women who shouldn’t own a parakeet, much less bear children, and many have borne children in a way that forsakes God’s ordained pattern of marriage first, then child-bearing. So they come to church and are honored for their ability to reproduce? I think we should honor folks for their faithfulness, regardless of their marital or maternal status.

Even though I believe strongly that the church should have a strong ministry support for families, a family does not always consist of a mother and a father and 2.4 kids. I don’t agree with comments about the ‘cult’ of the family, but I also think singles and widows/widowers are often neglected.

Within teaching the whole counsel of God, there is no harm — in fact there is much good—in teaching or mentioning honoring our own mothers. The Bible commands us to honor them, and it doesn’t specify to only honor them if they’re saved, if they’re exemplary, etc. That was something I had to learn in my mid-teens, when I became a Christian but my parents had not. That was a turning point in my relationship with them.

I’ve also heard preachers preach about a particular mother in the Bible — Hannah, Mary, etc. — on Mother’s Day. Since all Scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable, there is something for everyone to learn in those passages whether they are mothers or not.

I think mothers can use a little encouragement. It is a hard, often isolated, often overwhelming job, especially when children are little, but it is also a joyous one. I think there is good in pointing out it is a noble profession, in this day when some put careers ahead of motherhood or have abortions for various reasons, and it is good to remind mothers that even in this they can do all things through Christ who strengthens them.

But I don’t think we need to give out roses to them in church or that kind of thing.

I don’t think there is a “cult” of motherhood, and it certainly wasn’t invented by florists.

I mentioned recently on my blog that I look at in the same way as Thanksgiving: we’re supposed to be thankful all the time, but times like that of special emphasis remind us of that duty and help us focus and implement it, hopefully in a way that will carry through beyond the day itself.

I do think we need to be mindful of those for whom the day might be painful: those struggling with infertility, those whose children or mothers have died, those whose relationships with their mothers are painful. But I think we need to find balance: I think they need to be helped to lean on God’s grace rather than not mentioning mothers, motherhood, or Mother’s Day at all, but on the other hand, we can be mindful of not emphasizing motherhood in a way that flaunts it, so to speak. The girltalk blog had some helpful posts last year along some of these lines: those who have [URL=http://www.girltalkhome.com/blog/Grief_on_Mothers_Day] lost children to miscarriage or a later death[/URL] , those who struggle with [URL=http://www.girltalkhome.com/blog/Infertility_on_Mothers_Day] infertility[/URL] , and those who have [URL=http://www.girltalkhome.com/blog/Sadness_on_Mothers_Day] wayward children[/URL] l.

I think it depends on what you mean by ‘honor’. Of course we should be respectful and submissive to our parents, but that is not usually what we mean when we ‘honor’ mothers on Mother’s Day- it is usually having them stand, applauding, handing out roses… I think we diminish the essence of the word ‘honor’ when we use it that way. It would be good to see emphasis on honoring one’s mother (or father or teacher or President) whether they seem to be ‘worthy’ or not. But to bestow a favorable recognition on someone who is not, by their behavior, ‘honorable’- just because they produced children… that’s where I object to the wholesale ‘celebration’ of Mother’s Day in church… if that makes sense. I’m not sure if I’m being clear enough, because I certainly do not wish to convey that we should not show honor to our parents. To me that’s another subject entirely.

On whose authority would we dedicate the Lord’s Day to someone else? Certainly not Scripture’s. According to the regulative principle of worship, which (though capable of some latitude in interpretation) states that God alone has the right to determine true worship and that He has done so in the Scripture, the church is not at liberty to parcel out Lord’s Days among whichever secular events it should choose. The regulative principle isn’t just a Presbyterian thing, either. Many historic Baptist leaders and confessions (Second London Baptist for example) articulate it quite clearly. In America we’ve really lost track of a biblically and historically informed theology of worship.

As was mentioned above, there is a difference between mentioning a secular holiday like Mother’s Day and incorporating into the service in such a way that it impinges elementally on worship.

[Susan R] I certainly do not wish to convey that we should not show honor to our parents. To me that’s another subject entirely.

That’s supposed to be what it is about. From what I have read even [URL=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_Jarvis] Anna Jarvis[/URL] (who pushed for the initial holiday) did not like all the hoopla that followed.

[Charlie] On whose authority would we dedicate the Lord’s Day to someone else? Certainly not Scripture’s. According to the regulative principle of worship, which (though capable of some latitude in interpretation) states that God alone has the right to determine true worship and that He has done so in the Scripture, the church is not at liberty to parcel out Lord’s Days among whichever secular events it should choose. The regulative principle isn’t just a Presbyterian thing, either. Many historic Baptist leaders and confessions (Second London Baptist for example) articulate it quite clearly. In America we’ve really lost track of a biblically and historically informed theology of worship.

As was mentioned above, there is a difference between mentioning a secular holiday like Mother’s Day and incorporating into the service in such a way that it impinges elementally on worship.

I don’t think preaching Ephesians 6:1-4 or some other related passage or preaching something about mothers from the Scripture on that day, if the pastor is so led by the Lord, is a violation of the Lord’s Day. I do agree that we don’t need to have mothers stand up, pass out prizes to them, etc.

[Barbara H.]

[Susan R] I certainly do not wish to convey that we should not show honor to our parents. To me that’s another subject entirely.

That’s supposed to be what it is about. From what I have read even [URL=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_Jarvis] Anna Jarvis[/URL] (who pushed for the initial holiday) did not like all the hoopla that followed.

And I think you can see from all the comments made in the OP article that there is a divide between what Mother’s Day is supposed to mean and how it is actually observed.

I tend toward the view that Mother’s Day means nothing if my kids dishonor me regularly during the year, but make much ado on the holiday. I’m that way about most holidays- it’s fine to set aside a time to focus on or commemorate something meaningful as long as one’s ‘normal’ behavior is consistent with that meaning at other times.

[Barbara H.]

[Charlie] On whose authority would we dedicate the Lord’s Day to someone else? Certainly not Scripture’s. According to the regulative principle of worship, which (though capable of some latitude in interpretation) states that God alone has the right to determine true worship and that He has done so in the Scripture, the church is not at liberty to parcel out Lord’s Days among whichever secular events it should choose. The regulative principle isn’t just a Presbyterian thing, either. Many historic Baptist leaders and confessions (Second London Baptist for example) articulate it quite clearly. In America we’ve really lost track of a biblically and historically informed theology of worship.

As was mentioned above, there is a difference between mentioning a secular holiday like Mother’s Day and incorporating into the service in such a way that it impinges elementally on worship.

I don’t think preaching Ephesians 6:1-4 or some other related passage or preaching something about mothers from the Scripture on that day, if the pastor is so led by the Lord, is a violation of the Lord’s Day. I do agree that we don’t need to have mothers stand up, pass out prizes to them, etc.

I agree with Barbara. I fully believe that we can honor the Lord and keep the regulative principle while still having a sermon/service theme that is fitting for Mother’s Day. It is a matter of focus and, for lack of a better term, common sense.
Such a service does not have to resort to sappy sentimentalism or the “Sunday School contest” mentality: “Let’s have all the moms stand while our ushers come forward and give each one this beautiful little keepsake…” I believe that Charlie may be reacting to some experiences like that he has had in the past.
On the other side of the ledger, I have heard memorable sermons on the family, particularly by D. James Kennedy and David Jeremiah on radio and TV, which have affected my thinking and moved me to tears. Generally, they were stand-alone messages which were preached on Mother’s or Father’s Day.
Note to preachers: There is an art to constructing that type of a message. If you don’t have a good handle on it, it would probably be best for you NOT to celebrate Mother’s Day. We really don’t want to hear you reminisce about your childhood or give a law-based rant to the kids of the congregation — most of whom are down in Children’s Church anyway :) :|

Setting aside a day to honor mothers is not in lieu of honoring them year-round. It does not have to be in lieu of worship or in place of honor to God. It is an acknowledgement of the gift of motherhood, not a statement that all who are mothers are good ones. It is an affirmation of honor to our mothers, which is a godly thing and is not out of place, if done in a proper way, once a year in our Sunday services.

It is a mine field! Avoid it at all cost!

At one point I had more women in my congregation who endured infertility, miscarriage, and singleness than I had mothers. It is a hard Sunday for ones whose mother recently passed away, wife died, or are pregnant out of wedlock. I know godly women that skip church that one Sunday out of the year because of a grief they carry.

I had to grapple with that very question, as I have just been in my church for a month now. I has started a series in Eph. 4. Would I interrupt the series to preach a “Mother’s Day” message? And what is a “Mother’s Day” message anyway. Would I just preach to Mothers, Grand-mothers, and future mothers?? Is that Biblical? Would I turn to Proverbs 31 and extol all the women of my church to fix food that come from all around the world, learn dress-making skills as to clothe her family in scarlet, and work until the candle goes out, then get up before the rooster crows?

As I prayed about it, I decided that I would preach a message about a mother, but it certainly wasn’t going to just be to women. I preached a message on from I Samuel 1 about Elkanah and Hannah, entitled: Leaving a Lasting Legacy. It wasn’t sappy, or full of Reader’s Digest Illustrations…it was about Hannah and Elkanah’s God (God should be the center of any message). It dealt with issues of wanting to have children, and not being able to (and since I’m married to a woman who has had multiple miscarriages, and has prayed, pleaded, and waited on the Lord for our one child…I am very well acquainted with those in my congregation who can’t have or who have lost children.) I do not believe that one should avoid preaching about motherhood or being a godly mother b/c you might have people in your congregation who can’t have children, I just think it needs to be done wisely and with compassion.

We did have a few gifts that we handed out to some of our women that morning, but it wasn’t confined to just mothers, and every woman (with or without children, of any age) received a carnation as they left.

This past week, I have received several calls from some of the women in our church thanking me for the fact that message wasn’t a traditional “Mother’s Day” message. I even talked to one woman who said ‘she was afraid I would get all sentimental about mother’s day, and she didn’t think she could have handled that because her mother died three years ago, and this was the 1st Mother’s Day she had been back to church.’

We didn’t call is a “Mother’s Day” service, we called it what it was a “worship service”. Just my thoughts…over all I believe that the Lord was honored with what we did last Sunday, and I believe that women (and men) in our church were encouraged.