Do You Wear Pajamas to Church?
Among Christians there has been a valid concern over the decline in clothing standards. Unfortunately, this concern leaves a large looming question over the discussion- what standard should we adapt? Opinions range from allowing the risqué to imposing legalistic parameters.
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Often the discussion centers around the clothing choices of the female- for obvious reasons- but I want to step back from that discussion to look at the broader issue. Not only is there division among the brethren over what is or what is not modest, there is division over what is or what is not casual.
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The discussion often goes something like this, “Our world has become far too casual and it is obviously creeping into our churches.” Some of those who make these statements may have people showing up to church in their pajamas, but I fear that some are wishing that they could get all the men to wear ties.
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Before going any farther on this discussion, I think we need to look at what the scripture actually has to say on this matter. James 2:2-4 says, “For if there come unto your assembly a man with a gold ring, in goodly apparel, and there come in also a poor man in vile raiment; And ye have respect to him that weareth the gay clothing, and say unto him, Sit thou here in a good place; and say to the poor, Stand thou there, or sit here under my footstool: Are ye not then partial in yourselves, and are become judges of evil thoughts?”
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It breaks my heart when I see how some Christians completely ignore this passage and actually do the complete opposite of what it says as they look down on those who they do not think are dressed up enough. Many need to repent and realize that even John the Baptist did not dress up like people thought he should. “But what went ye out for to see? A man clothed in soft raiment? behold, they that wear soft clothing are in kings’ houses.” (Matthew 11:8) “And John was clothed with camel’s hair, and with a girdle of a skin about his loins; and he did eat locusts and wild honey;” (Mark 1:6)
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Today I wouldn’t be surprised to hear someone say, “We didn’t come out to hear someone preaching in Carhartts and work boots.” In our culture, the standard for men dressing up is to wear a suit and tie, but we must understand that this is a cultural standard, not a Biblical standard. In Jesus’ day the cultural standard John the Baptist was held to was soft clothing, yet he did not match up with that standard.
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Now before I go any further, I can understand why some are concerned. I too have seen people going to Walmart in their pajamas, and think that maybe they should pay a bit more attention to their culture. As Christians it is tempting to go to extremes. The one extreme would be to expect that every man should come to church in a suit and tie. The other extreme would be to say, “just come in your pajamas.”
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As Christians, we should not ignore our culture so that we end up drawing undue attention to ourselves, but we also need to recognize that different cultures (whether it be different geographic locations or eras in history) have different ways of dressing.
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I also believe that it is good and proper for us to wear nice clothing as we go to church, but dressing up for one man may mean putting on a tie- dressing up for another may mean putting on his new Carhartts. Of course if all you have to wear is pajamas, please come to church in them.
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I think the understanding we should strive for is modesty and propriety. Our culture would still find it objectionable to wear pajamas to a wedding or a funeral, unless extraordinary circumstances warranted it. And it is never appropriate to be immodest, or striving to garner attention with one’s appearance, whether that be by adorning one’s natural beauty, being extreme or gross, or engaging in the “I’m more spiritual than you are because I wear/don’t wear _____”.
Applying principles of modesty and propriety are the same for every culture. It may be considered SOP in some cultures to ‘dress up’ by wearing an extra bead on the string around their waist, but that doesn’t meet the Biblical standard of modesty/covering one’s nakedness.
I think the ‘suit and tie’ standard is somewhat outdated, and as a measure of spirituality it is ludicrous, but the idea being appropriate and respectful of where you are and why should never become quaint or obsolete.
IMO there are some standards for public places that should be observed, period. “No shoes, no shirt, no service” used to be posted on the doors of businesses. There is nothing wrong with teaching folks to respect the gathering of the church in the same way you’d respect a job interview, your place of employment, school, a wedding, a funeral, a concert…
And since the gathering of the church is to a large degree for the equipping of the saints, then equip them in the area of modesty and discernment.
“And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in knowledge and in all discernment, that you may approve the things that are excellent, that you may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ, being filled with fruits of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.”
I think contextually this passage in Philippians is discussing more than choices of morality and cultural involvement, but I also think it can be applied in this discussion. Dress is not simply a cultural thing. Dress, music, etc. in the local church, when motivated by genuine love of the Lord and of the brethren, tempered by wisdom and knowledge of God and His standards of excellence and holiness, measured with evidence of growth in righteousness and abandonment of the world’s idea of morality, (super)naturally leans toward excellence rather than slovenliness, weakness, showiness, or popularity. I am always excited to see new, growing believers desiring to give their best and express their best for their Lord as they grow in love for Him and His children - even in light of cultural influences or their own material capabilities. In my experience ironically, it’s often the undiscipled believers(?), also often raised in “Christian” homes, who are most influenced by the world and its cultures when it comes to choices of values, morals, companions, and allies.
Really appreciate the points that are being made in the previous two posts too! There’s no room for arrogance in the Body of Christ - especially when it comes to “means” …and modesty and discernment are solid Biblical principles!
CH CH
emitte lucem et veritatum
What we need to be careful about is how we define “slovenly”. Sure- abandoning the concept of personal hygiene could be considered slovenly, but some people really are doing the best they can under their circumstances. We lack compassion when we demand that people meet a standard of propriety and neatness, but walk away when it comes to providing the means and support to do so. It may take time and energy to help folks with such personal issues, but 1) are we willing to put our mouth where our standards are, and 2) is that what we want to focus on if they are a ‘baby’ Christian or struggling spiritually?
Time and effort in discipleship (spiritual mentoring) are exactly what we’ve been called to do. Even personal hygiene is a spiritual matter. There are all kinds of Scriptures teaching that we’re to care for one another, and being stinky can certainly inhibit real ministry and relationship building to a degree. So does arrogant snootiness. Who best to come and sensitively tell you that you have halitosis than a humble, gentle, gracious, loving brother or sister in Christ? And what better motivation to try to improve such things than love of the brethren and a desire to serve the Lord more effectively? (btw, if it is an actual medical problem causing the hygiene problem - if it cannot be helped - then the Scriptures which teach about ‘bearing one another’s burdens’ comes directly into play!)
It is the Scriptures which best teaches a man about proper relationships with God and man. I believe this is true whether you’re gifted with wealth or blessed with poverty. The right response is one of personal discipline grown out of submission to Christ.
Although folks often take certain passages out of context in Philippians, I think it’s important to notice this:
…I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content…
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I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
sandwich this verse:
I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.
Poverty and wealth are not material issues, but spiritual - especially when it comes to relating to our church family - and this is true whether we’re discussing those who have been granted either, or discussing proper perspectives of them.
To get back on point, wearing pajamas to the gathering of the family is also a spiritual matter - and in the vast numbers of cases, IMO it implies a spiritual problem, not a material one.
Bro. Chapman, I basically agree. My concern is that we don’t try to address the behavior to the neglect of addressing the heart.
..wearing pajamas to the gathering of the family is also a spiritual matter - and in the vast numbers of cases, IMO it implies a spiritual problem, not a material one.
It may imply a spiritual problem- I agree. However, the more I work with people who are unchurched, the more people I meet who have were never taught even the basics of propriety - in behavior and appearance- and hygiene. It’s like expecting someone newly saved who is illiterate to start reading their Bible every day. We first have to provide them with the means to study and internalize the Word without being able to read it while also teaching them to read, and then they can begin to study Scripture on their own. If they haven’t got a clue about why they should brush their teeth or wear clothing that covers more than the basics, in my experience this is most often an ignorance issue, which one could say is spiritual because it is the result of walking in darkness, but I still don’t want to focus on their teeth or clothing because these are symptoms. I’d rather focus on the cure.
At a church I used to attend, a woman from a nearby housing project was visiting. One day she came wearing a very low cut top and short skirt. One of the deacons brought her a coat to wear and asked her to sit in the balcony area where no one could see her. She never came back. It wasn’t the time and place physically or spiritually to deal with her about her clothing.
If gentle, gracious, loving, and wise people are discipling those who need teaching and guidance, then they will know when to help folks with the outward applications of inward truths. The problem is that this usually happens the other way around.
I’m not saying any of this because I disagree, I’m just trying to clarify a bit more.
As far as that woman who was ushered out of sight…shame on them. That womans soul hung in a balance..and they tipped the scale the wrong way. I taught my boys to avert their eyes in such situations. Maybe the men in this instance should have been taught the same.
In His Hands, Nancy
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